Day 60 - Lost horse

• Matthias was desperately looking for his black plastic horse all day. We haven't found it and I'm pretty sure that he has lost it actually while carrying it around outdoors.
• Went horse watching again in the morning.
  
• In a brief period without nappies Matthias peed agains our couch, into a Playmobil plastic airplane and on the floor.
• Finished Ratatouille today, ranks as my second favourite Pixar movie after Incredibles.
• Matthias was playing outside a lot again today with his stones, Florian was doing more maths. It is really strange, how different children are even though we try to bring them up the same. So much for the theory that people are only defined by their upbringing.
• In the evening Matthias appeared naked in the bathroom when it was time to brush his teeth, when asked where his nappies are he looked down and replied: "Oh, I must have lost them".
• Bought a bluetooth stick today so I can backup my mobile phone numbers on the PC. Unfortunately the sync software didn't ask what data to sync so now I have about a billion outdated contacts from Outlook on my phone, arggllll!
• Lunch: Leftovers, Dinner: Asparagus and chicken.
  

Day 59 - Spring

• Start of daylight savings time. Good, I like it when it when there is more sun to enjoy in the evening. Also the kids slept until 8 = 9 this morning.
• Played more luckalicka in the morning.
• Then we did our first bike tour with Florian as it was very warm and sunny today. He was very excited and we cycled for 2 hours with 2 picnic breaks in between, quite a big distance for a five year old. Matthias was in his child seat, so he simply enjoyed the scenery and the food I guess.
• In the afternoon we enjoyed the sun in the garden, Matthias was playing mostly by himself all afternoon placing stones on the fence border and making "music" as he called it by banging the stoned against the fence. Florian got a book with primary school first grade exercises and he did calculations in the living room for the whole afternoon instead of playing outside!!! He'll turn into a real nerd one day. But numbers really fascinate him, so we let him do it.
• Lunch: Fried rice, Dinner: Asparagus & Chinese pork
  

Day 58 - Luckalicka

• We played football in the kids' room where the bed was the goal and I was the goalkeeper. After a while we wanted to switch and have Heidrun take over as keeper, but Florian said: "I can't hit the goal now, because mom is so fat!"
• Matthias was holding two nuts all day (he always has some objects that are his current favourite objects for the moment, like dice the other day). When he misplaced them he got al panicky "Where are my nuts, where are my nuts?!" That's always good for a laugh :)
• In the morning when the kids came into our room we played "wood, wood, wood" and "luckalicka" both games invented by Matthias. Basically you either scream "wood, wood, wood" or "luckalicka" and then jump onto a parent. Then he wanted me to join in, when asked who I should jump on he said I should jump on mom - ouch!
• Matthias discovered avocado between the apples. He immediately announced that he likes them "I like the green things between the apples, you need a spoon to eat them, I want some." "They are called avocados" "I like mamocados!"
• Evening: Watched Ratatouille, actually a very good movie, I wonder if I'll appreciate it as much when I see it the tenth time in a couple of weeks.
• Installed a lamp today. Something I always wonder about is if the people who design lamps actually have ever tried to install them. They should actually be forced to do so 100 times, before the f#*+ing thing goes on sale!!!! I explained to the kids that doing DIY is the only time when it is OK to swear.
  
• Lunch: Fish, scrambled eggs and vegetables, Dinner: Fried rice and leftovers
  

Day 57 - Fruit discussion

• I'm turning into a real housewife now. Today I sewed the sleeve of my jumper!
• Matthias tore Heidrun's necklace apart. She told him off but he immediately replied that I should fix it with a screwdriver.
• When I cut a kiwi I wanted to have for dinner Matthias came along and said: "I don't like kiwi!" "That's good, because it's not for you anyway!!!" "I like apples!" "Good, but I'm now cutting the kiwi because I want one" "I've found some apples!" "Great, where did you find them?" "Here!" (pointing to our fruit basket) "Wow Matthias, you are a great adventurer, you could easily survive in the wild" "I want an apple now" "Ok, I give up"
• When toddlers throw a tantrum they literally throw themselves on the ground. I really wonder what nature wants to achieve by that. It really doesn't improve their situation at all, they get dirty, concrete in winter is very cold, etc.
• Florian can already buy his own stuff in Mc Donalds, he really starts to grow up.
  
• Lunch: Chinese instant noodles (the kids love that stuff), Dinner: Mc Donalds ... very healthy day, I know.
  

Day 56 - Asians = X-Men

• How to brush children's teeth (a guide by Karenzpapa). The theory: Brush every tooth and make sure it's clean, always brush from red to white to protect and massage the gum. Do this for 3 minutes twice a day. Afterwards make sure the kids rinse their mouth with enough water. The reality: "Matthias open your mouth." "..." "Matthias open your mouth." "Where is my horse?" "Matthias open YOUR MOUTH!!!!!!" Then you start wrestling down the child (we sometimes call him Mike Scofield, because he always flees) that is trying to flee. You catch screaming Mike on his way out of the bathroom and carry him back. You try some new tactics: "Mike what's inside your mouth? Are there any animals?" Then you start looking for his favourite animals in his mouth. That normally works and you can more or less get his teeth cleaned.
• On our way to nursery Matthias was carrying his favourite plastic dinosaur. Since the dinosaur also walked there, he stopped every now and then to touch the ground with the dino's feet. You can imagine that this slowed down our "Moonwalk" even more. We were virtually stopping time again. I actually found out now that maybe Matthias is not simply slow but has a genetic mutation that allows him to slow down time. I've seen that in a documentary called "Heroes" where there is an Asian guy called Hiro Nakamura who has the same ability. So maybe we Asians tend to be X-Men since my super power is to get red immediately after drinking alcohol (not very useful to save the world I know).
• Matthias noticed the giant dog turd at the building site again. Funny, since he hasn't mentioned it in a while now. At the cat house he also mentioned: "Here's where the cats appear!".
  
• When I cleaned the living room Matthias asked: "Why do you do that?" I explained that kids make a huge mess and turn every room into a pigsty. He replied "No that's not true, children always clean up!" ... "WHAT!!?!?!"
• Showed Matthias a remote control car that I've found in the attic. Unfortunately we ran out of battery power after five minutes. But he liked it.
• We played with plastic animals most of the day again :( You really have to try that once in your life it's kind of a Zen like spiritual experience. Florian also joined in later on and has learned from me: he picked up two horses, placed them on the floor and announced that one is eating grass and one is sleeping :)
  
• Lunch: Curry chicken (yes I cooked a lot of that), Dinner: Pizza
• Night: Went out with colleagues. It's official now that I suck at pool billards.
  

Day 55 - End of holidays

• Children are genetically programmed to know when holidays are over. The last ten days Florian got up between 6 and 6.30 in the morning. Today it's the first day of nursery after the holidays and I had to kick him out of bed at 8.10 so I could get him into nursery on time.
• Every morning I prepare a snack box for Florian. Before the holidays I put apple slices into the box. Naturally he hadn't eaten them and I had forgotten about it. The thing that I found in the box this morning was quite scary. It was green, hairy and had some weird tentacles that stretched across the whole box. I immediately threw it into the bin and I think I heard it screaming a bit when I closed the lid.
• Florian was at our neighbours place in the afternoon. When he came back in the evening he didn't close the front door. When we noticed it, the door had already been open for an hour and the temperature in the hallway was below freezing (at least that's what it felt like).
• After Easter you have to cook food that requires hard boiled eggs. Luckily a lot of Chinese dishes can be used for that (curry chicken for example).
  
• Lunch & Dinner: Curry chicken.
  

Day 54 - Bicycle repair main Pt. 2

• Florian is a very slow eater. When he was two years old sometimes we'd spend two hours per meal until he had finished. Matthias is a VERY fast eater. You can never give him e.g. one whole slice of ham because he'd immediately try to stuff the whole thing into his mouth. So we have the rule now that we feed him pieces and he has to show us that his mouth is empty before he's allowed to continue. Otherwise he'd choke to death I guess.
• Florian discovered rhyming. That's quite funny because he invents some really bad and ridiculous rhymes. Like "Ich sag rot und du bist tot" (= I say red and you are dead).
  
• When going to the supermarket Matthias fell asleep on his tricycle. That's quite an accomplishement because it's so uncomfortable. But he managed to put his head onto the handle bar and then shut his eyes.
• Matthias asked about numbers of things again today. During dinner he wanted to know the numbers of rice and a chicken leg.
• Matthias today noticed that there is no bear hunt in Lion King. That's definitely true! There aren't even any bears in the whole movie.
• Florian's bike has a flat tire AGAIN. So wheel off, fix it, wheel back on. I wonder how he managed to poke the tube twice within a month. Getting the tire off is the tricky part. Maybe there is some nice and elegant way to achieve that, for me at least brute force and a lot of swearing did the trick eventually.
• I turned my kids into "Krocha". Only Viennese will understand that, but in the evening they were both running around shouting "Bam Bam OIDA!".
• Matthias didn't want to go to bed. He cried and shouted: "I want to throw my pajamas into the toilet!!"
• Lunch: Smoked pork, Dinner: Curry chicken legs.
  

Day 53 - The day after

• Florian and Matthias had a lot of chocolate today. The aftermath of Easter.
  
• For lunch to celebrate Easter we had Asian takeaway (Sushi and Thai curry, both were excellent). The restaurant is run by Chinese and is named "Willi" :)
  
• Matthias today got a book from grandma containing the stories of Jungle Book and Lion King :) So today Heidrun read the book to the kids and in the evening I watched Lion King on DVD with them. Disney definitely is successful with children.
• Two year old's really throw a lot of tantrums. One problem is that they notice that they have their own will which in many cases is complete nonsense (like wearing their boots on the sofa) so you can't allow what they want. Second is that they often overestimate their own abilities and then get frustrated (e.g. trying to run faster than their brother).
• One difficulty with Christmas and Easter is that relatives also want to give the kids presents but often later than the actual event. So for example yesterday when they got some more Easter presents from Heidrun's sister we told them that maybe the Easter bunny has come again or they haven't found everything. Same with Christmas child at Christmas. So it seems that they've all got Alzheimers.
• X-Files: During the day Matthias managed to shit on his right lower leg inside his trousers. We still don't know how he did that because the rest of his legs and trousers were clean so we didn't notice when changing nappies. Only in the evening Heidrun smelled something awkward during dinner, touched Matthias leg and exclaimed: "You got poo in your trousers!"
• Lunch and Dinner: Takeaway
  

Day 52 - Easter

• Today was Easter sunday. The kids were so excited that we got up at 6 AM to look for the presents the Easter Bunny has hidden. Heidrun got up at 5:45 to hide the stuff, when Florian got up she was still out there so I told him that she was in church. Easter is a lot more fun with kids. We/the bunny gave them lots of sweets and a book and DVD each.
• Dads to crazier stuff than moms. While we were brushing the kids teeth I discovered that you can slide really well with slippers on our wooden floor into the bathroom where the floor is tiled. Florian was laughing a lot when he saw that. So to impress him I had another go with high speed. Unfortunately I couldn't stop and fell head over into the bathtub which was actually quite painful :) But Florian couldn't stopped laughing anymore, haven't seen him like this in a long time, so it was definitely worth it. I couldn't find one slipper which had actually landed in the tub as well during the crash. Heidrun only shook her head and noticed that she actually has three and soon four kids at home.
  
• After his nap Matthias today threw a tantrum that was unbelievable. He just couldn't stop crying because he wanted to wear his boots in the lounge. It was so funny that I filmed it on video.
• Watched parts of "Die wilden Kerle" and "Ratatouille" today.
• We are more and more happy with our house that we've actually bought over the internet. Since we both didn't really have a clue about houses we are only now finding out that for a terraced house our's is a lot more spacious than the other's that are currently being built.
  
• Lunch & Dinner: Fried noodles
  

Day 51 - Statistics

• Matthias question session while playing with toy cars: "Why are the big cars big?" "Because the manufacturer made them big." "Why are the small ones small?" "Same reason." "Why did the make them big?" "Because!!!!"
• When putting on lotion for Matthias chickenpox I was wondering if there are some statistics about parents. Because I guess during an average parents live you'll have changes a couple of thousand nappies, brushed more kids teeth than your own, clipped a million finger and toe nails, wiped many many arses, put on about a ton of lotion for various skin diseases, fed about 200 chicken 50 whole pigs 500 apples and maybe one carrot, changed clothes to fill a whole H&M store, read stories from children books the amount of 50 copies of "War and Peace", answered more questions than Wikipedia, walked 3 times worth the earth cirumference to nursery/school and back in slow motion, ... and many many more things. All that would cost about one third of your lifetime, I wonder what people without children do during that time?
• Matthias loves to play with plastic animals. Unfortunately he always wants you to join him. This is definitely the pinnacle of boredom, honestly there is nothing more boring than that, I assume even watching paint dry is more exciting as at least there is some sense of accomplishment when it's finally dry :) Normally I simply put up 3 random animals and then announce that my animals are now eating gras, end of story.
• Sometimes when Matthias cries and you try to comfort him, he actually doesn't want to be comforted. He then cries even more "But I want to cry now!!!"
• Lunch: Chicken from yesterday, smoked pork, Dinner: Smoked pork, aubergine, rice, carrot soup, smoked salmon
  

Day 50 - Music in the house

• What I've always wanted is a stylish appartment/house like in "About a boy", well that's not really possible when you have kids, because apart from everything being littered with toys and food you also always have some kind of decoration at home. This starts in November when you put up Christmas decoration then continues after Christmas with Mardi Gras stuff that then directly combos into Easter decoration.
• Had a dance session with Matthias in the morning. He really likes those and wanted to hear the music very loud. So today we tested out how much volume the neighbours can take. Seems the walls are really soundproof because in the end it was nearly as loud as in a club and still no one complained (or we just couldn't hear the door bell anymore :)).
  
• Played Singstar today for Matthias' entertainment because I started to run out of ideas what to do with him. After my brilliant performance of a couple of songs I asked him if he liked it. Well I got a definitie NO! So I guess that's it for my singing career.
• Florian came back from grandma's place. He and his brother were immediately back to fighting mode. Some things never change!
• Evening: Went to cinema and watched "No country for old men", very good movie with some hilarious dialogue.
• Lunch: Leftovers, Dinner: Chicken with onions and egg

Day 49 - Poorly

• Matthias felt very poorly all day, has been crying a lot and woke up completely panicking during a nap. Poor little fellow, in the evening he's been better, so I hope he'll get well soon.
• In the morning he spilled some water on his tights. Since I couldn't be bothered to change them we blow dried them while he still wore them. That was quite exciting for him, because I guess Heidrun normally would just change them :)
• My mom was over, so I could take a nap as well, last night was a bit rough, because Matthias was so annoyed by the itch of the chickenpox.
• Matthias today suddenly said: "Jungle book Peter is so funny." I guess that's a compliment.
• Today I removed a gigantic bogy from Matthias' EAR! I didn't even know an ear could produce something like that.
• Matthias starts to understand what's going on in movies. Recently when watching Lion King he always gets quite desperate when Mufasa dies saying: "The one with the red hair shouldn't die". I always console him that he's only sleeping. Luckily Simba later on looks exactly the same so currently he still believes me. (It doesn't help that Florian keeps telling his brother that he's dead.)
  
• Lunch: fish, Dinner: fried noodles
  

Why I don't drink alcohol

Cause I've been asked a LOT of times in my life already why I drink nearly no alcohol :) Here it is for the interested: Today I've found the article on Wikipedia about that condition. It's interesting that not only the tolerance for alcohol seems to be a lot lower, but also the risk of getting cancer is a lot higher, doh! Funny thing is that the gene is dominant and since there's so many of us Asians I guess we'll breed alcoholism out of this world, cause eventually you know we're gonna get you :), no need for prohibition.

Day 48 - Reappearing stuff

• In the morning Florian called from grandma's place and asked how his brother is. That's quite thoughtful considering that normally they try to kill each other.
  
• Florian likes to play Battleships recently which is called "Schiffe versenken" in German. Matthias always calls the game "Kinder versenden" which translates to "mailing children" :) That would be a cool game, I always tell him "We'd ship you two off to Honolulu".
• Matthias was looking for James (a train from Thomas the tank engine) for a couple of weeks, today we found it in his toy toolbox in the space where the driller goes. He was quite excited.
  
• Florian stole a carrot from me four days ago when I was cooking and hid it behind a pile of puzzles. Today Matthias found it and thank god in time, so it wasn't mouldy yet. At first I didn't get it when he announced: "Here's a carrot! Here's a carrot!"
  
• Oliver (a friend of mine) has lent me a book. Today Matthias tore a page out of it. Sorry Oliver, I'll buy you a new copy :)
• Here's a good trick if you want to get your child to take a nap in the afternoon: Push him around in the pushchair facing the sun. It's so bright, that he has to close his eyes and will eventually fall asleep.
• I bought Wasabi coated peanuts today. Matthias wanted some. We told him that they are really hot and he wouldn't like them. He still wanted some. We told him again ... he ate one ... it was hot ... he spit it out ... he cried ... for 2 minutes ... we've told him so.
• Lunch: Pizza, Dinner: Mozarella and tomatoes, fried vegetables.
  

Day 47 - Chickenpox redux

• We went to Vienna today to visit my work, go to McDonalds and then hand Florian over to his grandparents where he'll stay for 2 nights.
• At work Charlie, a nice colleague, built a boomerang for the kids. Designed by him and good flying performance, the kids were quite impressed (well, Florian was, Matthias didn't really get it, I think).
• We took the subway line 6 which is brown on the map, so I told Matthias that we take the brown train. That was a BIG mistake, he was devastated that the actual train was red and kept asking for the next half hour when the brown train would arrive. Obviously he couldn't be talked out of that. "Only the line is brown, not the train, do you understand that?" "No, because that's stupid!"
  
• At McDonalds they now have started to introduce free refill in Austria! We still have to pay for ketchup though (and it's the only country I know where you have to do that)!
• Matthias has chickenpox as well now, doh! I managed to get both kids with chickenpox during my paternity leave ...
• Lunch: McDonalds, Dinner: Leftovers
  

Day 46 - Star Wars

• Florian invented a joke today: "Two men play chess, one says 'UNO'!". Well not very funny, but you can start to see the basics of humour developing in his brain.
  
• Do you know rainsticks? Do you know what a "washing slide" is ? (I'm not sure what the correct English word is, but basically it's a big pipe connecting our bathroom to the cellar, where the washing machine is, where you throw in the dirty clothes so you don't have to walk the stairs). Florian today took a full box of marbles and poured them down the slide! That was very cool, because it sounded like a gigantic rainstick, more like a typhoon actually.
• I have a couple of miniature comic Star Wars figures. One of them is Han Solo in carbonite. When you wind him up he shakes himself out of the carbonite. Florian asked me today what the black stuff is. I told him that's carbonite. He answered: "Oh yes, I know that, Superman is weak against that!" "No, that's cryptonite!"
• One other figure is Boba Fett. I explained the kids who that is and that his father is Jango Fett. Florian immediately wanted to know who his mother is. "Well, there is no mother he is a clone." "What is a clone?" ... long explanation about cloning follows. "But still he needs a mother because who gave birth?"... long explanation about scifi and breeding units. Matthias asks: "Who is Han Solo's mother?" ... I shouldn't have started the whole topic!!
• Most respected jobs for kids (more specific: boys) a father can have: binman, firefighter, policeman, builder, lorry driver, race driver. Least respected jobs: investment banker, lawyer, accountant, controller, quality assurance for binders. Game developer is at least OK.
  
• Lunch: Pizza, Dinner: Vegetables and rice.
  

Day 45 - Dice Dice Baby

• Heidrun found the black dice!
• We were invited for lunch at Dani's (a friend of ours) place. Matthias managed to gather 4 dice from various games and carried them around the whole afternoon.
• Dani's boyfriend asked him: "Hey Matthias, wanna roll some dice? What did you get? Five, cool!" He is a very nice guy.
• Florian = Gauss: In the afternoon Florian suddenly told me that there are 21 dots on a dice. I replied "Great, and how did you calculate that?", assuming that he simply summed them up. He answered that this is three times seven!!!! That's my son, I'm very proud!!!
• After the invite I went for a walk with the kids. A toddler's life is brilliant: Matthias had a nap in the pushchair. When he woke up he realised that meanwhile I had bought a chocolate cake and immediately demanded some. So still wearing all his clothes he got 2 pieces of cake. I want that life!
  
• On saturday we were invited at another friend's place and when asked, Heidrun had no clue how I take my coffee, so I guess I have to return my green card :)
• Lunch: Tomatoe soup, lemon chicken plus vegetables, Dinner: Spaghetti
  

Day 44 - Red and Green

• Florian decorated a wall with stickers. Generally when you have kids your walls get quite a grungy look, but that's ok, that's what walls are for anyway and gives your home a bohemian vibe :)
• Matthias spilled a full cup of water, I actually do that a lot as well at the office, but with more sophisticated fluids like coffee or tea. My colleagues use to make fun of me but now I have the proof that it is genetic and inheritable!
• The weather was brilliant today and we spent a lot of time in the morning just lying in the sun in our garden. With children having a garden is a very convenient and nice thing and definitely outweighs the inconvenience of living a bit further from Vienna.
• Matthias ate wax today. It was red and wrapped around some cheese so I guess it looked edible.
  
• At dinner we talked about Green Lantern because Florian is quite into super heroes now. Suddenly Matthias started singing "Rabimmel, rabammel, rabum" (to all non German speakers here's why).
• Lunch: McDonalds, Dinner: Bread, cheese, sausages
  

Day 43 - Dice

• Matthias lost his black dice. He got an orange and black dice from two different games and for some strange reason he really likes them. Also he is always rolling a 5, because that for the time being is his favourite number. He carries the two dice everywhere and roles them every now and then and is happy and content that he rolled a 5. Now he has lost the black one and is VERY desperate, always asking where it is. We've looked for it everywhere and still can't find it.
• We coloured eggs for easter today. During that process I also coloured three fingers which are now completely red. The colour doesn't get off.
• In the afternoon we went to Farbie's the indoor play area again. I got some time on the trampoline! Yessss, trampolines rock.
• Lunch: Curry chicken, Dinner: noodles and leftovers
• I went out in the evening to a party at a colleague's appartement, it was a nice party, but I left quite early, still being tired from the day at Heathrow.
  

Day 42 - Eeengelaaand

Went to London today with a colleague to attend a developer conference. It was tiring, but still a nice change from the daily routine. The conference itself was also quite interesting. Airport hotels suck. They are in the middle of nowhere and there's nothing you can do nearby.

Day 41 - Gourmet

• Picked up Florian, Monika and Veronika from nursery. Half way home Veronika noticed that she hadn't changed from slippers to her boots. Great, so we went all the way back, receiving lots of grins from my fellow mothers :), changed shoes and then went off again.
• The kids were very slow walking home, my mom had announced she'd arrive in five minutes so I tried the old trick of starting a race: "Who's first at the front door?". That always works, all three started running!
• I bought some smoked salmon in the supermarket and the kids nearly ate it all. Both really love seafood, mostly salmon, surimi and caviar. Mental note: have to find cheaper stuff for them to like (e.g. salted bread).
• Florian visited David a friend in the afternoon. They had been fighting apparently and Florian also tore his trousers :) Anyway he said that he fights a lot better than David, because he knows how to fight like a Ninja!!
• Lunch: salmon, Dinner: curry chicken
  

Day 40 - Bicycle repair man

• Florian's bike had a flat rear tire. So nice dad that I am, I fixed it. This was a very exciting experience for Florian as we had to get the tire & tube off the bike, find the hole, drive to a shopping center, find a sports store, and buy the repair kit then get back home, fix the tube and then reassemble the bike again. Since I haven't done that in the last 20 years or so, it was also quite exciting for me. Things learned: take a picture of anything you disassemble in its original state, that helped a lot when putting it back together again. Second: no one actually fixes tubes anymore the salesman at the store said, because the kit for repairing the tube cost only one euro less than a whole new tube, but Florian still wanted to fix it because that's more adventerous :)
• Afterwards I went to do the cycling/jogging combo with Florian again. I noticed that running actually improves my neck pain, I guess I'm starting to really get old :)
• Heidrun made the kids run circles around the couch again, Children are really easy to entertain.
  
• Matthias today said: "I don't know what I should say now, Papa". Me: "Well, that's good then just be silent, you don't have to talk all the time!"
• Lunch: Noodles, Dinner: Fried vegetables and noodles&rice
• At bedtime Matthias wanted to sleep on top of his brother and they REALLY fell asleep with Matthias lying on top of Florian's back!
  

Day 39 - Stuff you don't want to hear

• Florian asked why kings are more likely to have daughters than sons? When I asked him why he thinks that is the case he replied that in fairy tales there are more princesses than princes.
• Matthias smashed my glasses onto the floor out of fury. Fortunately they didn't break.
• Something you never want to hear: Florian came back from the toilet and said: "You know what's funny, after I pooed I flushed twice and the paper and poo still isn't gone." I had a look and Florian had managed to jam the drain.
• Something else you never want to hear: I changed Matthias' nappies, he asked again if I had brown fingers, which I denied. Then he said: "But I have something brown on my jumper!". I panicked, but it turned out to be some chocolate porridge from breakfast.
• When you are a dad you turn into toy repair man. Everyday something breaks and slowly I am getting really good at fixing all kinds of stuff.
• Matthias today said: "Who's first to have golden hair, ME!!" Heidrun simply replied: "Golden? Don't exaggerate, it's more like poo brown" :)
• I found out you can remote control toddlers when they throw a tantrum. When I noticed that Matthias was angry again I told him: "Well, smash yourself on the ground, I don't care." He looked at me and smashed himself on the ground and I didn't care :) Then I said: "When you're done you can get up again." After sulking for another minute he got up again.
• Matthias today wanted to zip Heidrun's cardigan, but couldn't do it because she's already to fat due to her pregnancy which she explained to him. This made Matthias really furious and he shouted: "Get the baby out I want to close the cardigan". Then he started squashing her breasts to see if this would reduce the volume enough but he still didn't succeed. More tears ...
• Lunch: Chinese pork, Dinner: pork & beans & scrambled eggs with pepper.
  

Day 37 & 38 - Vacation

Heidrun and I were off to Salzburg for the weekend ... without(!!!!!) kids. My sister in law and her boyfriend Alex took care of them. It was our first trip without children ever and it was very nice and relaxing. In the meantime Florian and Alex built a Lego tower that reaches our ceiling at home! And I guess we have decreased our children's chances of every getting any cousins :)

Day 36 - Fast

• A friend of mine taught his child to breathe like Darth Vader when he was two. So I'm quite proud that both Florian and Matthias now can make the sound of Imperial Probe Droids :) - I know, it's very nerdy.
  
• Matthias today wanted to wear underpants instead of nappies. I carefully instructed him in their use, that he must promise me to tell when he needs the toilet. He was quite proud running around in panties and Florian remarked that Matthias looks dorky and called him "underpants man". Two hours later Matthias obviously had forgotten all the instructions and peed himself.
• Matthias had diarrhoea today and we had to bathe him twice because of the smell.
• Matthias now is obsessed with being first or fastest at everything. So he often runs around shouting: "I am fastest, I am fastest". Then Florian overtakes him just to annoy his brother and Matthias starts crying.
• Matthias today said: "Who is first having black hair? My dad!". That's quite true and since I was the only 100% Chinese in the room there was no one who could have overtaken me :)
• Florian often opens the fridge and just has a look what he could eat next. Heidrun being an environmentalist told him that this is not good because it wastes energy and thus burns fuel which would kill the dinosaurs (we've told him that fuel is made of dead dinosaurs). Florian noted that they are already extinct, so she corrected it to polar bears. Florian then asked: "why do we need polar bears anyway?"
• Lunch & Dinner: Curry chicken.
  

Day 35 - Customer service = morons

• Today I managed to phone my old British car insurance (official phone calls with 2 kids in a room are quite a pain). I need a letter from them stating that I was insured for 2 years with 6 years no claim, so I can get a discount from my Austrian car insurance. I had already told them all that already a month ago and they had assured me the letter would be here within the next 2 weeks. Anyway this morning I called to inquire why the letter hasn't arrived yet, all that with the kids screaming in the background. The woman from customer services said that the letter wasn't sent, because Tesco Insurance does NOT sent letters outside of Europe!! Well I replied, that this must be my lucky day then, because Austria happens to be WITHIN Europe!!!!! I guess being sarcastic was not the right approach :( because she immediately corrected(!) herself and said that they don't send letters outside the UK! When I asked her why last time they had me spell my entire address and assured me of the delivery of the letter she simply answered that she had checked with her team leader and there are definitely no letters being sent outside of the UK! My conclusion is: people working in customer services are either robots with bad AI or simply mentally challenged by even the simplest tasks.
• Matthias played with his snow globe today which is one of his favourite things. I told him ten times to be really careful when walking around with it and not to drop it. He assured me that he would be really careful and won't drop it. He dropped it. He cried. I had to clear away the shards and snow. I have to buy a new one.
• More UNO :(
  
• More Guitar Hero, still same song :(
  
• Lunch: scrambled eggs with onions and ham. Dinner: Vegetable soup, aubergine, eggs & tomatoes.
  

Day 34 - Chickenpox

• This morning we had snow. Weird weather, two days ago you can go outside with only a T-shirt and now it's freezing cold again. When Matthias saw the snow in the morning he shouted: "Birds, birds, there are lots of birds!". Florian: "No, it's snow, not birds" M: "No, they are birds, snow is red!" F: "No, snow is white!" M: "Snow is red!" F: "Shut up!" Matthias hits Florian with a toy car. He hits him again. I tell Matthias: "If you hit your brother he'll hit back." Matthias hits Florian with a toy car. Florian hits back. Matthias cries. "I told you so!"
• Florian got chickenpox. We noticed the spots in the morning. Quite funny as yesterday in playgroup I went on that everytime someone gets chickenpox in nursery Florian doesn't. Fortunately he only got the spots but no other symptoms.
• Today when changing Matthias' nappies I got some poo on my hand. Matthias immediately asked: "Why have you got brown fingers?" Me: "Good question, guess!!"
• Seems that Florian also starts to get fed up with his brothers constant questioning. I was in some other room today and overheard the following. M: "When does Papa come back?" Me: "I'll be back soon, I've got something to do" M: "When does Papa come back?" Me: "Give me five more minutes!" M: "When does Papa come back?" F: "He comes back when you stop talking!"
  
• Lunch & Dinner: Noodles with Maggi!
  

Day 33 - UNO

• In the afternoon I played 3(!!!) hours UNO with Florian. He's got his special rules, first only the special cards (+4, +2, stop, ...) are allowed, second we build our deck from the special cards of two normal UNO decks. I can tell you that this leads to some really weird games and requires completely different tactics. Sometimes you get an immediate winner hand (Florian had it twice) which consists only of stop cards and one other card :) I am not yet sure if the new rules are more fun than the original ones, but he refuses to play with the standard rules.
• Florian today announced that he wants to become a Maserati salesman when he grows up. Since they are so expensive he figured that this would be the ideal way to get rich fast. Why haven't I thought of that earlier?!
• Children often quote things totally out of context. I picked up juggling again and today Matthias watched me for a while in the morning. I had three white and one red ball. The red one is normally used for bounce juggling and thus bounces very well. When Florian came back home Matthias told him "The red one bounces everywhere!". Florian's look on his face expressed simply: "WTF?!"
• During playgroup in the morning we always do some handicraft with the children. Today a daughter cut of part of her mother's finger! There was quite a lot of blood, so always remember: handicraft is dangerous.
• Evening program: Portal which Florian refers to as "The puzzle game".
  
• Lunch: Lionheads, Dinner: Leftovers & fruit.
  

Day 32 - Race

• On the building site on the way to nursery there's a lot of action now, seems they are digging out a car park for the apartment house. So there are lots of diggers and lorries now. Everyday we have to stop in front of it and watch it for a while. When your kids are young the coolest imaginable job their dad could have I guess is digger driver (with binman coming as a close second).
• In the afternoon my mom came buy and played with Matthias so I spent two hours cycling with Florian. First hour on foot and then I switched to my own bike - try racing a five year old on a bike while running for an hour then you'll know why I was totally wrecked afterwards.
• We also met a boy from Florian's nursery who is older than him who was learning to cycle with his dad and still fell over a lot. Florian immediately cycled up to him and asked: "What, you are going to school next year and can't even cycle yet!?!?!" Children are not known to be tacful.
  
• Evening program was Guitar Hero once again. Still couldn't finish Crossroads!
  
• Lunch: Chinese fried rice. Dinner: Fried rice, eggs with tomatoes.
  

Day 31 - Chinese = party people (pt 3)

• Yesterday night I went to the "Flieger" party in the "Fledermaus" club where they play mainly German New Wave music. I went there with a friend from high school, and another one joined us later. It was a lot of fun although my limit of "99 red ballons" style music was reached after 3 hours.
• The bizarre thing was that there was a group of about 12 Chinese at the club. I guess they were all bananas like me (you know yellow on the outside and white inside and quite common - more so than eggs). We were all jumping around to German music from the 1980s. I'm quite sure they didn't celebrate their 2358th character learned at school as they must've all been older than school children (but I'm not 100% sure as Asians, you know, they all look the same to me and their age is quite hard to guess). So my guess is they were the Chinese mafia.
• My friend Oliver mentioned why it's better to go to a club now that we are over 35. First you don't have to be cool anymore, second you don't need to chat up any women, third you don't get embarassed anymore when jumping around like an idiot. Very true!
• This morning I remembered why it's not a good idea to come back home from a club at 4am now that I am 35. You feel tired and exhausted much longer because you can't sleep until 2pm, can't hear properly for a day and have a headache.
• In the morning we had our train station breakfast again where we buy something from the bakery at the station and then sit in the waiting hall watching trains pass by. It's still one of the best ways to pass a Sunday morning.
• Then we had a skype video conference with Florian's Paul in Hong Kong. Conclusion: Video conferencing is still a very immature technology! Constant loss of audio, video, both, connection, lag, bad image quality, kids turning off the PC in the middle of the conversation, etc.
• In the afternoon we had friends over for lunch and then we went to Farbie's together. On Sunday there are a LOT of children in there. It's very noisy and not ideal for a 35 year old banana geezer who has been clubbing the day before. A kid rode over my toes on a Bobbycar - ouch!
• Lunch: Starter: smoked salmon, then Jiaozi. Dinner: Leftovers.
  

Day 30 - Hospital

• In the morning we went to the hospital Heidrun is working at. It was open day and they showed the public how things work in a hospital. For the kids it was quite exciting as they could see where mom is working and Florian could fish for gummy bears using an endoscope. Also for adults it was interesting as a surgeon explained to me how a knee prosthesis surgery is performed, which nowadays works kind of like a Wii game - Trauma Center :) (I am actually quite sure that the Wii got quite a lot of its technology from surgery).
• Matthias peed on the carpet again while I was changing his nappies, so he also peed on his trousers and socks.
  
• Crossroads on Expert in Guitar Hero is very very very hard.
• Chinese is a funny language as pronounciation changes the meaning of a word completely. Instead of tractor Matthias always says Coke-chicken :)
  
• Lunch: Cake, biscuits, etc. at the hospital. Dinner: Chinese chicken with peppers, aubergine.
  

Day 29 - Greek Tea

• Heidrun offered to make me some tea in the morning. Unfortunately she'd only boiled enough water for her own cup, so she added some more water into the kettle when I noticed. After a couple of minutes I went back into the kitchen and poured the water which was cold as she'd forgotten to turn the kettle on :) I decided to make my own tea, I think pregnancy makes sure blood circulation is optimal for the baby and therefore less ideal for the mother.
• In the morning I was invited to another mom's place and Matthias and her son Michael played with each other, ..., well at least they were in the same room. It was very nice and Monika and I had a good chat.
• Then in the afternoon we had two kids over again one for Matthias (his Paul!) and Konstantin who is one of Florian's friends. I did a "Schnitzeljagd" (=scavenger hunt?) for Konstantin and Florian. One of the hints had a drawing of our couch on it. Konsti was standing IN FRONT of the couch shouting at full volume: "I recognize it, it's a couch, where's the couch, Florian where do you have a couch in your house?!"
• In the evening we watched jungle book again after quite a long abstinence. This time with a twist though as Florian wanted to watch it in Greek! (Well he didn't know it's Greek but he wanted the last language in the list on the DVD).
  
• Lunch: Trout & rice, Dinner: Pizza.